One Year Ago......................

It was snowing and there was tons of ice every where. I was for sure they would cancel my surgery. Chris and I left the evening before and stayed in a hotel near the hospital. He ordered a pizza while I drank homemade beef broth.

I woke up on Dec. 13th totally ready to go. Not nervous or scared. But excited about what I could accomplish.

We got to the hospital at about 9...waited till 11 to be called back. I got undressed, weighed, got and IV started, and there we sat until 7 pm. They were backed up because of the ice and snow storm that was blowing outside. I remember moving onto the wheeled table. I remember the mind numbing meds going in and my PA saying something to me. And that is it....

I woke up in the recovery room in bad shape. They wanted me out of there so I did feel quite rushed to up my clothes on and go. But I felt awful. Not pain but nauseous and totally out of it. This is quite typical for me with pain meds. They just really screw me up! Chris got me into the truck..words of advice..don't drive a 3/4 ton dodge ram and expect your wife to hoist her up very well! The wind was blowing and it was about -13 outside and it was MIDNIGHT. No lie.

We got back to the hotel and it really was a rough night. I propped myself up but was uncomfortable..I never was sick to my stomach but I just wasn't rebounding like I thought I would! We stayed an extra night in the hotel simply because I didn't think I could make the 1.5 hour journey home.

My recovery was most like everyone elses. I was waiting for the shoulder/gas pain to go. That honestly was the worst part for me. I didn't have to stay on pain meds for long at all. I was questioning everything I ate and was waiting to feel something different.

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I do have to say this whole banded experience has been a good one. No real downs. The only part that has been hard for me is the last month or so with my unfill and slow refill. But that wasn't an issue really it is just a stall in the weightloss speed.

I decided from the beginning..and then again 3 months in...to NOT compare myself to others. I would say that is the biggest struggle of all.
I started out weighing 249lbs. My BMI was 40.2



Dec. 10, 2010



Dec. 10 2010

I hate those pictures. I'd never show anyone those pictures. I fully intended on taking a picture of me wearing the same outfit but I didn't have my camera this morning.

Today I weight 183-184. My lowest weight was 178 before my unfill. BMI 29.6





 TODAY Dec. 13, 2011

My Goals for 2012

From the beginning I chose not to have a "goal" weight set. I know how my mind works and I don't do well with goals. But I know that for 2011 65 lbs. Was fantastic for me. Before my unfill I was 70lbs down in one year. So for 2012 I would like my goal to be to weigh between 150-160. That would be a loss of 25-30 lbs in one year. I can do that...right? Surely.

I would never change this adventure. I am happy and healthier. I feel good about myself. I feel like Chris and I get along better. He tells me almost every day that I look cute. Hell he probably did that before but it was blindness.

One day the acquaintances and friends will just see me. They will stop saying WOW you are looking good Amanda. I hope that when that happens I can still feel as good about myself (most days) as I do now.

Thank you for all the support and all the love. I without a shadow of a doubt attribute a lot of my success to each of you and blogging. I've been MIA recently which will change after Christmas I promise.

BOOB's was a life changing event. I recommend everyone trying to go. At least once. The love from that group is amazing.

This was just one year. Imagine what we all can be in 5 years.

Thank You.

S T R U G G L E

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.  ~Norman Vincent Peale

Baloney.

One might think that since this is a weightloss blog that the title of my blog might refer to my weightloss efforts.

Wrong.

Guys. I have no Christmas spirit this year. None. Not a tiny bit. Zilch. Zero. Nata.

I feel rushed, happy non depressed, but rushed. It's not like I feel rushed buying massive amounts of Christmas gifts because that isn't the case. My family (there are only 6 of us in the core group) traded names...my friends and I only got gifts for the kids...and I started buying for our English family months ago.

Don't get me wrong. I am happy. I feel and look healthy *ignore the massive cold I am getting over*. Our business is about to slow down. But honestly I thought it would slow down 3 weeks ago and we are still staying steady. As silly as it is I am really really enjoying the whole Stella & Dot thing. I made enough money to pay for my gym member ship for six months AND the last three fill appointments I have had. When I started I just wanted the damn jewelry.

Maybe the fact that I haven't decorated my house in Christmas stuff. My instant sentence combo made me almost write Christmas Crap. But I don't feel that way normally. I love decorating. "It's Cozy"...to quote the 'Holiday' with Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet which I've seen 17 times. But we didn't do it. Pure lazy really but we are leaving on the 21st and not coming back until the 9th of Jan and I just didn't want to clean up Christmas when I returned.

I am happy so why am I not Christmas Happy?

Maybe the 97 dozens of Christmas cookies I am baking tomorrow will help with that. You think I am exaggerating.

Perhaps I will awake...send my husband on a hike of 10 miles. Put Christmas music on and start creaming eggs, butter, and sugar and the magical Christmas spirit will arrive.

I'm not counting on it.

~

Weightloss musings. As you may recall from a distant blog....I had a massive unfill 8 weeks ago. In those eight weeks I gained between 5 & 8 lbs. 3 weeks ago I had a fill and felt no restriction. Not really no restriction, because I didn't gain. But I could eat more then I liked.

SO. Tuesday I had another fill. I really thought my surgeon would baby step me since I was getting close to a TOO tight area. Yah know. .25-.5 ccs. Nah he went right to the fill level I was originally. My green zone if you will. He gave me .75 ccs! So I now have 7 ccs in my band. As of this morning I have lost 2 of those lbs. Which I am thrilled about. And even though I haven't had the downward emotional spiral that I thought I would have with the gain I feel pretty good! I feel confident that I will get back to 175 in no time.

On Tuesday I will have been banded for 1 year! Stay tuned for further reports!

~

I do miss you my lil Christmas Cactus's

I am neglecting you. But I do promise there isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about my little blog world.

Gratitude...

Like always I am a busy little bee. But there are a few things I wanted to be sure to tell you girls about.

First one being I got my Secret Bandit gift in the mail while our friends were in town! Who ever is my secret lil gift giver is a great one and some how picks things that I am in need of!

This treat was a journal! I am a little bit of a paper nut and I simply love this! It is sitting on my bedside table ready for anything and everything that comes to my mind! I even used it yesterday while I was in a conference call! You know what I just realized...I was wearing my Nike Just DO it shirt at the same time! Haa Awesome!

So again my lil bandit! Thank you.


Tuesday was the best day in the world! I'm not kidding! I woke and traveled to Atlanta to take my mom to the airport. She is in NYC with her best bud...eating at fancy restaurants, drinking at great bars, and going to see fabulous shows. Anyway on the way we stopped for coffee. We don't have a Starbucks in my town so it is quite exciting for me. So I ordered two drinks! 1 Salted Caramel Mocha and a protein shake. Yum. My plan was to kick my mom out at the curb and head on over to our very own LYNDA'S house!

Us Cuties in Chicago (Lynda and Amanda)

Can I first say that meeting Lynda this year has been fantastic. Not only was it great to know someone BEFORE going to Chicago but she truly has become a very close friend! It feels like we've known each other for years. It is a shame that we live 2.5 hours away. Mainly because I am such a busy bee and it is hard for me to take time away. But I can not recommend more finding someone close by that is also banded. You will not believe how good it feels to have someone that knows how you feel about this weird device inside of us!

Anyway..I get to Lynda's and she has a fire in the fire place and a gift left out for me. The first time I met Lynda we took our husbands to a baseball game. While they ate stadium food she prepared a white bean and tuna salad for us! She drizzled this fantastic olive oil over the salad to finish it and I have been remarking on that olive oil ever since. So guess what my lil present was? Some fabulous olive oil. But it didn't stop there. In my bag of goodies I also had some artisan tea, some Himalayan Pink Sea Salt, their favorite coffee, this amazing goat cheese with fig jam, and some lavender bath salts cause she knows how much I love a bath.

Is she not totally insane?! I mean who does that. Those are simply all of my favorite things all in glass jars! I came empty handed like an idiot! But that wasn't all! The woman makes fresh soups probably daily. I felt like I was on Top Chef trying each of the 4 (yes 4) she had for me to sample. I had taste testing spoons and all. These weren't just any soups ya'll. Fresh ingredients, slowly cooked until perfect. Lets see if I can remember all four: Pureed Roasted Yellow Tomato and Yellow Pepper, Pureed Cauliflower and White Cheddar, a Green Kale soup, and a pureed Carrot and Butternut squash (I think) They were all simply amazing. Then she gets out three little containers from the freezer and hands them over to me in a cooler bag. So for lunch yesterday I had the cauliflower and white cheddar. I literally licked the bowl.

Then she takes me into her closet! I proceed to try on all her clothes and ended up with a shirt and 2 or 3 pairs of pants. WHICH I PROMPTLY left there. (I'm a dummy).

I got a call from my dad that said the temp was dropping and the snow was falling and I better get home! So off I went...after a fabulous afternoon of gabbing and gift getting!
So ya know...Thank you Lynda! You know me very well and I love you. Thank you for our new friendship!

Then last night I made a tomato, mozz cheese, balsamic vinegar salad and drizzled the fabulous olive oil over the top along with the pink sea salt. I promise you...there is a HUGE difference in flavors.

Today I am in a rotten mood. Everything is pissing me off. It's cold outside. Really cold. I hate money. I mean I love money but I hate paying bills. I got furious at Chris this morning over nothing that either of us can control. And I feel like a bitch. Even after jumping on the sale and finally seeing a lower number since my fill last week. Still didn't make my day better. grr.

However I am wearing two of my favorite Stella & Dot pieces today The Petra bracelet and my earrings are The Adrianne Chain earrings. I am trying to take more pictures with my jewelry on just to show how wearable the items are. Sometimes I over look the flashier types of jewelry because I think it looks like to much! But since I have lost this crazy weight I don't feel so self conscience. So today I am wearing nothing fancy at all and boots and the jewelry has improved the look! Not to mention I still like the hair. So I think I will post a picture...I am posing..just so I can get the jewels in. 

PS...shameless or shameful advertising. I have a goal to get 11 more orders Dec. 20th. I could use your help. You can Shop my website here : www.stelladot.com/amandajshaw or if you email me
directly I have a special deal only for my girls that live out of my general area!


Alright my little jewelry flowers: