I preach not to compare and I know my story is my own...AND I know I am successful...AND my life is really a good one.
But.
Why can't I be one of those girls that loses 6 lbs in a week? Just once. If I could lose 12lbs in a month...I would be happy. Right? I think I could be. I wouldn't even need to post it. I could internally be happy. I mean tell my husband and a random few but I wouldn't brag. Ha. Just once.
I work out. I work out really hard I think at least 4 days a week....I really do keep my cals under 1200. Sometimes 1300 but rarely more then that! I don't drink with my meals. I get my protein in pretty well and I am a positive polly! So why can't I drop 4lbs in a week? Please. Thank you. I'll be a good girl forever.
Here is what it means to me:
That perhaps I do infact need a fill. To say I am in a green zone is only a mental thing cause I am happy. Physically I am not in a weight loss green zone, yet. I think my issues with PBing are my own only. Not the bands. I think that when I PB I know before I take a bite that it was a bad idea. Like yesterday I cut a donut into four pieces first thing in the morning before coffee..before anything! Now the dumb ass I am knows that I am tight in the morning but I still ate it. I got half down before I got sick. The dog enjoyed the other half. Or like I am starving, cooking dinner, but instead of waiting the 5 more minutes before we can sit and enjoy it I take a bite. Not only is it hot but I swallow to much or it is un cut. And guess what happens next. The whole meal is ruined. Now of course this isn't every day but 90% of my episodes are my own darn fault. Darnit. So a fill it is. On the 19th of April. A little ways away but I think 19 days isn't that long! Perhaps I will learn some patience in 19 days. Chew lady. Slow down girlie...eat a snack at 4 so that by 6 you aren't famished..woman!
That and I better lose SOMETHING with my no carb week starting on Wednesday. I don't need 8lbs like lovely Amy. I'd smile with 4. BUT SOMETHING other then 1.5 measly lbs.
(disclaimer..1.5 lbs is a really good loss and I don't really think it is measly)
~
I have been thinking about goals. I am one not to really make any firm goals because I don't want NOR will I feel guilty if I fail. It isn't a good quality trait to have. It means that goal rewards don't work for me either. I mean I tell myself that when I lose X amount I will do "this" or buy "that". But it doesn't motivate me really. I guess what motivates me is feeling good. I feel good right now. I love that I am working out and actually enjoying it. I love that when I take my t-shirt off in the gym locker room and wear just my sports bra (it is a tank top style no belly showing) I feel like I look good until you get to the pooch on the belly. But I feel thinner in certain outfits. I have in the past gone through stages where I just let my hair grow. It looks decent but no shape. I do what is easy and forget about having much style. That isn't me ladies. I like having a cute cut and a little color. I like wearing jewelry and makeup. Not over doing it but I know I look better. So I guess feeling thinner has motivated me to keep up with my look rather in just make do. I even verbally said so this morning to my husband. "I need to keep myself up because it helps with my self esteem. " Strange because if you ask anyone who knows me well they wouldn't say I have a low self esteem at all. I am opinionated, I am out going, I am social. But I say no to lots of stuff or I won't wear this type of shirt because I don't see perfection. My firmness is seen as strong but a lot of the time it is because I am not willing to try.
But I am getting better. Trying new classes..wearing tighter workout clothes...
I just hope I keep it up. I am determined to do it.
7 comments:
Keep up the determination...this is a mental game! :) You can do it
Wow girl, you have high expectations! My goal is two a week! But I see your frustration. Remember the slower you lose (steadily, but slowly) and continue working out, the more you will firm up. That is way better than losing quickly and being flabby! You are doing AMAZING!!!
You do have high expectations! I say as long as you are doing what you need to do and losing 1-2 lbs a week... you should be ok! I am happy if I lose a lb! At least it is a loss and not a gain! Your doing great! Keep it up!
I've. been jealous of the women who dropped 5 of 6 pounds a week, but just remember no one does that every week. Being slow and consistent will get you there, it just seems a little boring sometimes.
I know what you mean. But this is so much a head game and you can't over think it. You are doing great! Just stick with it, sweet girl!
I soooooooo hear you about wanting to have a dramatic loss here and there...especially when I've been focused. But Linda is so right...slow and consistent is great. And in the long run, I've realized that I've really been starting to set some good health habits that will help me in the long run. You are doing great and I think you look healthy and beautiful!
I've had my band for a little over 18 months and I'm just now getting to a place where I feel like I can make long term goals for myself and not feel discouraged. I'm a big believer in focusing on those small goals, 5lbs, 10lbs what have you into you are in a better place mentally.
You are doing such a great job, just continue to notice how you feel and how your perception of yourself is changing. This is a long journey and you are doing so great!
Post a Comment